| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. For as long as she lived, she had no idea there was anything sexual or seedy about being called "Lolita". |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes. If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Mr. Chicken (my favorite spot in Cleveland) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi (preferably Pepsi Jazz Caramel Cream). Better yet, how about not show up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five six wonderful, slap-happy dogs, a bird (some kind of dove/pigeon mix), and a cat, all of whom I love to pieces. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs, bird, and cat, we'll be instant friends. If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five six dogs, a bird, and a cat, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
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| Goofiest. President. EVER. |
| Thursday, January 26, 2006 |
He just interrupted my regularly scheduled programming to do what was being deemed a very serious and somber press conference dealing with what to do about Hamas. Ten seconds into his very grave speech, right after he uttered the words, "We live in momentous times," this shit happens:
 He tried to ignore it for a good five seconds, but it was SWINGING IN HIS FACE, blocking the camera. You gotta give it to him. He did try to act like it wasn't even happening. Finally, he had to acknowledge it, as ALL OF AMERICA saw it SWINGING IN HIS FACE.
 Turns out it was a piece of faulty equipment that chose the most opportune moment possible to break on our illustrious leader. Hilarity ensues. Turns out that faulty equipment was also blocking the only camera facing the Prez, so the next five minutes of the press conference were spent like this:
 Sorta took all the thunder out of his "serious" speech.
Let's face it, people. Our country's being run by the Keystone Cops.
 Remind me again who voted him in?
(Hey y'all, if I'm missing tomorrow after making this quip, send help. Call Kanye. Tell him to say something about it on tv and on a record. Have a rally. Send fried chicken. Don't y'all leave me hanging in the wind and let me go out like Tookie.)
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posted by Lo @ 10:34 AM   |
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| 5 Comments: |
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I know! I'm blogging about that right now...
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and james frey gets an oprah beat down! what a morning!!!!!
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don't worry about it lo...i gotta back on the PEPSI!!!!!
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sorry, y'all...can't type dis mornin'....i meant "i GOTCHA back on the PEPSI!!!!"
a brother needs some coffee, dis mornin'.... ;-P
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Good lookin' out, Lance!! Umma need plenty Pepsi to go with my fried chicken once they put me in Gitmo.
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I know! I'm blogging about that right now...