| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. To this day, she has no idea what a "Lolita" is. |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes. If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Mr. Chicken (my favorite spot in Cleveland) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi (preferably Pepsi Jazz Caramel Cream). Better yet, how about not show up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five six wonderful, slap-happy dogs, a bird (some kind of dove/pigeon mix), and a cat, all of whom I love to pieces. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs, bird, and cat, we'll be instant friends. If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five six dogs, a bird, and a cat, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
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| Omar Tyree Presents...How To Guarantee Yourself A Divorce (Without Having To Ask For It) |
| Wednesday, January 18, 2006 |
 I don't know if you've seen this article in the February issue of Essence magazine---the one with Lauryn Hill on the cover. If you haven't, I've provided it below. It is one of the most explosive, oh-you-wanna-start-some-shit-dontcha pieces I've read in a very long time.
It's written by NAACP Image Award winning/bestselling author Omar Tyree, who's not exactly known for being either shy or conservative. Omar is a firebrand, a self-proclaimed cultural griot who relishes contention and is quick to speak his mind and tell you the way he thinks things should be.
 I know Omar, so this isn't a personal dig at him, and I've never met his wife. For all I know, she could have cheered him on as he wrote this article (although I find that incredibly hard to believe, as she appears to be the intended target). This post is more about me wondering how I would respond if my man wrote an article about not exactly having his exceptionally intense male needs met, and then said article appeared in the most widely read magazine among African-American women. (I'm assuming Essence is tops in that category, but don't quote me. It could be O Magazine or something else for all I know. Any way you slice it, a helluva lotta people read Essence. Period.)
Here's just a hint of what Omar said (words in bold are my emphasis):Active men have always had extra mojo in their tanks, more than the average woman could keep up with. We are the barely-ever-sleeping, early-rising overachievers who have been spoiled by our own history of success, and, quite honestly, we love being rewarded for it. Now I understand that we can't always have what we want when we want it, but a hardworking man expects to receive as much as he gives. [...] So the question becomes, if his wife has run out of her initial fire, how willing is that man to live without it? After a while, if that one woman continues to keep her man malnourished, it is incredibly hard for him to say no to the hundreds of other women who are more than ready to feed him what he needs. I don't know about y'all, but if my man wrote something like this in a major magazine, all his shit---books, clothes, computers, jewelry, coats, shoes, music, manuscripts, pictures, pomade, doo-rags---would be on fire in the driveway when he returned, and I'm not a violent, knee-jerk kinda girl. Notice I didn't say "when he came home," because he wouldn't have a home anymore. Not with me. There'd be a gilded greasy spot in the driveway (melted jewelry, pomade, and all) marking where he made his last stand.
I'm just saying.
I'm all for servicing and being serviced and not taking each other's sexual needs for granted, even if there seems to be a marked disparity in the intensity of our drives, but I wouldn't want to be put on blast about it, nor would I publicly call my man out. Unless I was throwing down a gimme-more-dick-or-else gauntlet for real. You can't take this kind of stuff back. This is both a threat and an invitation. (To the wife and the groupies, respectively.)
Anyway, here's the article. You be the judge. Click the image once to enlarge it, then once it opens on another page, click it one more time to enlarge it again so that it will be large enough to read.
 [click image to enlarge]
Happy reading. Keep in mind this is the kind of stuff that makes you slap your man for no reason. Just for what he might be thinking. Your man may be nothing like Omar. In fact, I'd be willing to bet Omar would tell you himself there's not another man as alpha as he is walking the earth.
And in the words of Martha Stewart, that's a good thing.
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posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM   |
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| 2 Comments: |
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Hey I saw omar at a book signing once he was witha woman but it wasnt his wife
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ROFL!! ROFL!! ROFL!! ROFL!!
And so it begins!!!
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Hey I saw omar at a book signing once he was witha woman but it wasnt his wife