| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. For as long as she lived, she had no idea there was anything sexual or seedy about being called "Lolita". |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes (although obviously I can't eat fried chicken nearly as much as I'd like). If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Church's (that's right, I said Church's) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi. Better yet, how about not showing up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you or take a long time to return your calls. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? (Exception: I will happily take all calls related to business or to share fun/exciting/major news. I'm just not one for jawing on the phone just to be jawing.) |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. I'm always on my laptop and connected to the internet as I work and when IM's pop into my screen out of nowhere, they break my concentration and often startle the sh*t out of me in the process. So don't do it. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five six wonderful, slap-happy dogs and a cat, all of whom I love to pieces. I had a bird (a Roller pigeon that I rescued in LA on New Year's Day in 2004) named B-Bird (what? that's a good name!) who passed away in February 2009, which broke my widdle heart in half. He loved me so, as I did him. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs and cat, we'll be instant friends, and if you ask about B-Bird, I'll probably hug you (unless you smell...wash first). If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five six dogs and a cat, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
|
| Here's Your Passport Straight To Hell. |
| Wednesday, March 08, 2006 |
Have any of you ever heard of this term?
Goatse
I hadn't. At least, not until I came across it casually noted in an article I was reading last night (now that I know what it is, I can't imagine why it would be casually mentioned anywhere---note, I'm not casually mentioning it now; I'm doing so with great gravity...trust). After I saw the word, I Googled the damn thing. Now, more than ever, I'm convinced that one day, my need to know is going to lead me down a cyber rabbit hole straight to hell. Beelzebub himself will be standing at the end with flames and a pitchfork, saying, "Welcome, Lo. We've been waiting for you. You should have never Googled that shit."
Anyway, there it is. I don't even know how to pronounce it. I will provide no links whatsoever to help you locate the word's meaning. You're at the mercy of your own curiosity. Heaven forbid, should you succumb, you find a live shot of what it is. Make sure you haven't eaten recently. And, oh yeah, make sure that, if you're going to faint, you're someplace where you'll have a soft fall.
|
posted by Lo @ 1:22 PM   |
|
| 12 Comments: |
-
Well f*&^ing thanks LO! Your taking my curious azz with you. "Guy Opens Ass To Show Everyone". Wow & why...
-
Is THAT what it stands for, LBoogie? You're a better person than me, girl. The minute my stupid ass Googled my way to a site that filled my screen with an image of the guy doing it, I simply closed my laptop. I just CLOSED it. Didn't exit programs, didn't shut it down the proper way, just closed it. Then ran to the kitchen to get some water. I didn't get back on the computer for a while after that. Who comes up with that bullsh*t???????
-
AND - they have like a cult following. Get this: you can get tshirts, cakes, food, etc... And I thought I was f&^%ed up... Of all the ways to jack off your time money and mental power - WOW!!!
-
OMG!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!! and then I threw up my breakfast.
-
ladies...ladies....that wasn't so badddd....try going to rotten.com
and yup, just finished off my "jill scott" breakfast platter...."juice, biscuits (homemade and skratch, from MY HANDS, not that can shit, y'all be eatin') two scrambled cheesy eggs, backon (i reckon?) and grrrrrits!
hang in there ettevy! next time, i'll hook you up!... ;-)
-
They got cakes and t-shirts, LBoogie? What the hell??!!! And Ettevy, you looked anyway, even though you had a full stomach??? And Lance, you can COOK?????
What planet is this??!!
-
Lo, some things are better left un-discovered. My son goes to a predominately white school so I, unfortunately, have been privy to many gross things, Goatse included.
Pray for them.
Peace(wyviaypf)
-
yes Lo, curiosity got the best of me and i looked .... neva again.. neva eva again...
Lance... errrrrahhh.. what time is breakfast tomorrow?
-
Lance! You got me got me going now you sexy-chocolate, militant and can cook! Triple threat guy!
-
breakfast is whenever ladies....a brother is trying to hold his own.
-
Lance is a QUADRUPLE threat because he can quote from D.C. Cab! Props to you, Lance.... now, please make me some biskits. :)
-
Biscuits and goatse. I would have NEVER put those two words in the same sentence.
Only in The Lo Zone.
|
| |
| << Home |
| |
|
|
|
| About Me |
|
Name: Lolita Files
Home: Wonderland, Midwest Central, United States
About Me: I'm the author of six novels. My novella, "Three For The Road," included in the three-novella anthology, You Only Get Better, was published in March 2007.
See my complete profile
Email Me!
|
| Previous Posts |
|
| Archives |
|
| Links |
|
|
| Powered by |
 |
|
Well f*&^ing thanks LO! Your taking my curious azz with you. "Guy Opens Ass To Show Everyone". Wow & why...