| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. For as long as she lived, she had no idea there was anything sexual or seedy about being called "Lolita". |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes. If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Mr. Chicken (my favorite spot in Cleveland) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi (preferably Pepsi Jazz Caramel Cream). Better yet, how about not show up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five six wonderful, slap-happy dogs, a bird (some kind of dove/pigeon mix), and a cat, all of whom I love to pieces. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs, bird, and cat, we'll be instant friends. If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five six dogs, a bird, and a cat, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
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| Snakes On A Plane!!! What To Do If It Really Happens!!! |
| Friday, April 21, 2006 |
 As y'all know, I can't wait for this movie. It just might turn it into the summer's big blockbuster hit.
In the meantime, though, here's something we can all focus on: the what-ifs. And just in case you happen to find yourself at 30,000 feet with a shitload of slithering terror, well...here's a handy-dandy guide on just what to do.
 [click image to enlarge. click again to make bigger]
Fly safe, people!!! Try not to get bit!!!
Scuttleslut: WARNING: What to Do for Snakes on a Plane
Previously: The Lo Zone: Snakes On A Plane!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
posted by Lo @ 11:04 AM   |
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| 2 Comments: |
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on the real...the best thing to do in "such" a situation is do.....nothing. snakes are reactive by nature. they normally don't attack you unless provoked. being a country bo' from the south, you see snakes as common as deer, rabbits, coons, possums, etc. one of the most poisonous snake in the world is the black mamba in africa. and it's also the fastest snake in the world. if provoked, it can run like 15 mph on the ground and then bite your ass to die in about 4 hours later. it's venom is so poisonous that once bitten your blood will eventually harden within your body forcing itself out of every porous hole on you, ears, nose, mouth and so on.
in the u.s. look out for rattlesnakes, cottonmouth water moccasins and coral snakes.
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Thanks for officially scaring the shit out of us, Lance.
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on the real...the best thing to do in "such" a situation is do.....nothing. snakes are reactive by nature. they normally don't attack you unless provoked. being a country bo' from the south, you see snakes as common as deer, rabbits, coons, possums, etc. one of the most poisonous snake in the world is the black mamba in africa. and it's also the fastest snake in the world. if provoked, it can run like 15 mph on the ground and then bite your ass to die in about 4 hours later. it's venom is so poisonous that once bitten your blood will eventually harden within your body forcing itself out of every porous hole on you, ears, nose, mouth and so on.
in the u.s. look out for rattlesnakes, cottonmouth water moccasins and coral snakes.