| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. For as long as she lived, she had no idea there was anything sexual or seedy about being called "Lolita". |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes (although obviously I can't eat fried chicken nearly as much as I'd like). If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Church's (that's right, I said Church's) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi. Better yet, how about not showing up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you or take a long time to return your calls. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? (Exception: I will happily take all calls related to business or to share fun/exciting/major news. I'm just not one for jawing on the phone just to be jawing.) |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. I'm always on my laptop and connected to the internet as I work and when IM's pop into my screen out of nowhere, they break my concentration and often startle the sh*t out of me in the process. So don't do it. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five six wonderful, slap-happy dogs and a cat, all of whom I love to pieces. I had a bird (a Roller pigeon that I rescued in LA on New Year's Day in 2004) named B-Bird (what? that's a good name!) who passed away in February 2009, which broke my widdle heart in half. He loved me so, as I did him. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs and cat, we'll be instant friends, and if you ask about B-Bird, I'll probably hug you (unless you smell...wash first). If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five six dogs and a cat, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
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| You Know You've Been Dying To See Me Again. |
| Tuesday, May 02, 2006 |
 Yeah. You know you missed this. I can feel it. I can see it on your cyberfaces.
She's on the final stretch of that thing, y'all. She'll actually be finished by the end of today. Then it'll be 'round the clock her, so you better drink this in while you've got the chance.
Anyway, I cum come bringing tidings of whoretastic stankness great joy. I finally found a pole!!! Especially since none of you bothered to find one for me. Here it is:
 Nice, huh? I thought so, too. I was particularly excited about it being red. (Vickie, you might want to look into one of these. Click the picture to go to the website.)
So let's get things going. I got the outfit. I got the pole. And I've also got the music...a HoZone theme song, if you will.
So start throwing dollars. This is an all-cash zone. There'll be no looking for free. What, you think these titties came cheap just because I'm a cartoon?
I used the same doctor Star Jones did. I don't know what y'all thought. Click the link below and let's get it started up in this piece. (A new window will open to play my song. Be sure to click back in this original window so you can look at me and my pole while the music is on.)
Previously: The Lo Zone: I Know, I Know. |
posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM   |
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| 9 Comments: |
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I am on the muvafuckin flo . . .Ho, oops, I mean Lo, oh shit whoever you is today, you are insane.
Music is hot, I actually have never heard that song before -- knew of it but never heard it.
Glad your "thang"is almost done.
On the real tip, and I think it proably started in LA. There are pole parties where a professional pole dancer comes to your house with a portable pole and teaches you and your guests how to work the pole. I wonder if that is what Tupperware had inmind when they started those in-home demos.
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Picture me rollin down I-95, with a 40, some oooo-weee and Luke playing the theme music. Ho, you is straight crazy. I'd pay to see you work the pole any day (one tig ole bittie on each side of the pole! - now that's what I'm talking bout!) You bout to make me ready to move back to Florida or head out West, either way some sun and ho's is good every now and then.
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Hey Lo!
Thank for the pole information - I am excited!!! First the biscuits not the pole! Summer is going to be great! lol
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there's no business like ho business like no business I know ....
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(srluzp)<--- even big brother is down wid lo!!!!!
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wowwwww...see you know lo' has class. fuck lil john and nem...she went all the waaaay back to da "bottom" to get da "root of all hip-hop evil" luke campbell.
if you don't know....luke changed da hip-hop game, lyrically and visually. take luke campbell outta the game and we'd still be hoppin' around like mc hammer and poppin' our neck for chicken bites.
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ROFL! Thanks for the tip on the pole. I'm on it! Literally! LOL.
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lol...wow, vick..you got it goin' on like that?...wowzers! ;-P~~
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Name: Lolita Files
Home: Wonderland, Midwest Central, United States
About Me: I'm the author of six novels. My novella, "Three For The Road," included in the three-novella anthology, You Only Get Better, was published in March 2007.
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I am on the muvafuckin flo . . .Ho, oops, I mean Lo, oh shit whoever you is today, you are insane.
Music is hot, I actually have never heard that song before -- knew of it but never heard it.
Glad your "thang"is almost done.
On the real tip, and I think it proably started in LA. There are pole parties where a professional pole dancer comes to your house with a portable pole and teaches you and your guests how to work the pole. I wonder if that is what Tupperware had inmind when they started those in-home demos.