| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. To this day, she has no idea what a "Lolita" is. |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes. If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Mr. Chicken (my favorite spot in Cleveland) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi (preferably Pepsi Jazz Caramel Cream). Better yet, how about not show up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five wonderful, slap-happy dogs and a bird (some kind of dove/pigeon mix), all of whom I love to pieces. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs and bird, we'll be instant friends. If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five dogs and a bird, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
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| No Shame In This Game. |
| Wednesday, May 31, 2006 |
You know her, you love her, you've talked to her right here in the comments sections of this very blog, but did you know that Lo Zoner South Park Vickie...
 ...is actually bestselling author Victoria Christopher Murray?
And guess what? She's got a brand spanking-new novel out that's the long-awaited sequel to her first book, Temptation.
 ...and it features her steamiest, most scandalous character of all time, Jasmine.
Show her some love, y'all. She's one of our own. Buy the book. Go out and see her when she hits your city, which could be at any moment. She's well worth it. Victoria Christopher Murray is one of the best writers around. She knows how to tell a juicy, compelling, page-turner of a story, and this one is definitely hot, hot, hot!!!
Victoria Christopher Murray.com
Amazon.com: A Sin and A Shame
Simon and Schuster: A Sin and A Shame |
posted by Lo @ 5:21 PM   |
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| Attack Of The Bored, Overcompensating Nerds. |
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You can't make this stuff up, people.They may sport love handles and Ivy League degrees, but every two weeks some Silicon Valley techies turn into vicious street brawlers in a real-life, underground fight club.
Kicking, punching and swinging every household object imaginable — from frying pans and tennis rackets to pillowcases stuffed with soda cans — they beat each other mercilessly in a garage in this bedroom community south of San Francisco.
Then, bloodied and bruised, they limp back to their desks in the morning. See, this is what happens when you think too much. Braininess isn't always a good thing. Remember, some of the most notorious murderers had super-high IQ's.
MSNBC.com - Tech News & Reviews - The first rule of Silicon Valley fight club is... |
| posted by Lo @ 1:57 PM |
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| The Irony Is...After Such A Noble Gesture, He's No Longer Necessary. |
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I mean, seriously...who wants a dickless man 'til death do you part?
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| posted by Lo @ 1:02 PM |
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| This May Be A Bit Of A Stretch. |
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I didn't get a chance to discuss this yesterday because it was such a crazy and hectic day, but I figured I'd address it before it passed from public relevance (which, I'm sure, it already has).
Yesterday, Mariah Carey was feted by Gillette for having the best legs. The legs of a goddess.
 Right. That's what I thought, too.
When I think of best legs, her name definitely isn't the first thing that comes up. Her legs are nice and all, but "best"? That's a pretty loaded word to just be randomly slangin' around.
Per Yahoo! News:Gillette Venus (PG), a recognized authority on women's legs, [...] named Mariah Carey the first "Celebrity Legs of a Goddess." The superstar, who captured three GRAMMY® Awards for her celebrated six-times platinum album The Emancipation of Mimi, was immortalized with a 16-foot high likeness of her perfect legs. Ms. Carey unveiled the replica during a ceremony at New York's legendary Radio City Music Hall, home to some of the most famous legs in the world.
[...]
"Mariah Carey was our hands-down choice for the first Venus 'Celebrity Legs of a Goddess' title," said Peter Clay, Vice President Premium Systems, Gillette Global Grooming. "She has gorgeous legs, and she radiates the inner beauty and confidence that embodies the Venus brand." "Hands-down"? Whut da blimey?
And they've also reportedly been insured for one billion dollars. According to what's being written in the press...
"The sum reflects her popularity."
Really? It does?
I mean, fa sho' The Emancipation of Mimi was hot to death. I still blaze it on the regular, but best legs? A billion dollars?
Okay. If they say so.
Yahoo! Finance: Gillette Venus Awards Best Legs Title to Mariah Carey
Digital Spy - Marey Carey insures legs for $1 billion |
| posted by Lo @ 11:42 AM |
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| How You Know Your Fifteen Minutes Are Almost Up. |
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 Hmmm. I'm not quite sure what I think about this one. I mean, we all came up on this company's products at some point. My first colognes and makeup came from them when I was a kid, and I really liked their stuff, some of which was pretty cool. (I once had a malted milkball-flavored lipstick that smelled so authentic, I gobbled down the whole stick. Imagine how stricken I was to bite into a disgusting waxy goo once I got past the malt-flavored surface. I was in the back seat of our family car during a leisurely drive when I ate it and spent the next hour heaving all over the seat, much to my father's displeasure. Hey, I was six. What do you expect? I used to eat doll heads back then, too.)
But I digress.
Per Page Six:Julia Roberts may have been dropped as the face of Christian Dior makeup, as Page Six reported last month, but the former "Pretty Woman" will still be the face of something. According to Us Weekly, Roberts is about to sign on as the spokeswoman for more downmarket Avon - for a whopping $2 million-$4 million a year. Roberts will join Salma Hayek (who earns a measly $1 million- $2 million a year) in representing the company.
Not that there's anything wrong with them. They've got cool stuff, and heck, they get a lifetime of props just on the strength of making Skin So Soft...
 ...which single-handedly saved me from being eaten alive by the mosquitoes in Mississippi when we used to visit my relatives during summer vacation (what was in that stuff anyway? if mosquitoes came anywhere near the force field SSS created around me, they were instantly dead).
This is Julia Roberts, the once-reigning queen of Hollywood and, for a long time, its highest-paid actress (that honor now goes to Reese Witherspoon).
 Now she's about to be shilling for a company that carries products like this press-on nail polish (!!!)...
 Hell hath no fury like aging in Hollywood.
Page Six: Makeup Switch |
| posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM |
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| Ooh, Now This Would Be Cool!! |
| Tuesday, May 30, 2006 |
This is was in Lloyd Grove's Lowdown column yesterday:When and if Star Jones Reynolds leaves "The View" — which many insiders still believe she'll do, despite her flack's denials — a surprise candidate might be emerging as a possible replacement: South Carolina talk radio host Bo Griffin. The fortysomething Griffin — who's rumored to have caught Barbara Walters' eye since the Gayle King boomlet fizzled — used to co-host the syndicated Fox show "Good Day Live" and was a correspondent for "Extra." A tipster says: "Bo is a journalist like Meredith [Vieira], but is a dead ringer for Star. She's now the front-runner for Star's seat." But a spokesman for "The View" told Lowdown: "Barbara Walters said, 'That's fascinating' because she's never heard the same and we are not looking for a co-host." Still, Griffin apparently has no beef with Rosie O'Donnell. This would be great. Bo has a fantastic personality and would be a wonderful fit for the ladies on the show. She's smart, funny, pretty, and hella-vivacious. We know each other from our days back in South Florida where she was one of, if not the, most popular morning radio personalities in the Miami/Fort Lauderdale market)and was also quite well-known nationally for informercial endorsements.
It would definitely be an improvement over what's going on now!!!
New York Daily News: Lloyd Grove's Lowdown: If Star's a no, is Bo a go? |
| posted by Lo @ 12:03 PM |
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| I'll Be Getting A Late Start, But I'll Be Here. |
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Just suffice it to say it's been a hectic weekend. You'll see me sometime around mid-morning (west coast time, natch.)
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| posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM |
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| File Under, "No Duh!!!" |
| Friday, May 26, 2006 |
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| posted by Lo @ 10:40 AM |
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| Mel Jackson, South Park Style!!! |
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 If you know anything about the very deeply philosophical Mel and his IAMENUS principles, you know that this cartoon version of him is totally on point.
Mel Jackson Online |
| posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM |
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| For The Love Of Shibas!!! |
| Thursday, May 25, 2006 |
Lo Zone reader Denea noticed the new slide show with my babies (my dawgies) in the sidebar of this blog and wrote in to ask if they were Shiba Inus. As any Shiba owner knows, we tend to lose our minds with glee when someone recognizes our breed of dog. Denea is also the proud owner of a Shiba Inu---a beauty of a girl who, like my only boy dog, Milo, is almost eight-years old. Denea's charmer is named Indigo, and boy, does she have a great sense of style!!
 Denea says people thought she put that tutu on Indigo, but Indigo actually grabbed the tutu herself!! This breed is very specific about what it wants, loves, and needs. They are some of the sweetest, smartest, most adoring dogs you'll ever meet. Sure, you can't walk them off the leash (they have a natural hunting streak and more than likely will take off after the first small thing that they see moving), but they are pure joys to have around. And my big baby, Toshi, a Japanese Akita Inu (in the same family as Shiba Inus), gets along with them perfectly. If you're considering a pet, I highly recommend them. They're family-friendly, protective, alert, not too big, and highly-intelligent. Wonderful bundles of furry love.
 Indigo
Thanks Denea and Indigo for being a part of The Zone!!!
[Indigo is now also a part of my dawgie slide show on the left!! Shiba love, y'all, Shiba love.]
American Kennel Club: Shiba Inu |
| posted by Lo @ 4:47 PM |
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| Rock On. |
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While reading the New York Daily News online, I came across an article that was eerily similar to a scene in my new book, Sex.Lies.Murder.Fame.:
A homeless man brutally beat a drinking buddy to death, crushing his head with a cinder block in a cocaine-fueled fury over a seemingly innocent question, police said.
Daniel Callahan, 37, became enraged when William Moschinger, 46, of Selden, asked if he was a cop because of his clean-cut appearance, Suffolk County police homicide Lt. Jack Fitzpatrick said yesterday.
"Mr. Moschinger was struck, fell to the ground, and Mr. Callahan picked up a nearby cinder block and crushed his head," Fitzpatrick said, describing the after-hours fight outside the Cafe Bada Bing in Port Jefferson Station. You can't make this stuff up, people. I mean, I thought you could, but fact will always shame fiction by going just a little bit more over the top.
Still, we aim low high.
New York Daily News: Drifter held in grisly bar beating death
Amazon.com: Sex.Lies.Murder.Fame. |
| posted by Lo @ 11:13 AM |
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| "Bejeweled By Janeth" Is Here!!! |
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I tell ya, it's all about me today. Lolita. Sorta. Let me explain.
Remember at the beginning of last month I did a post about my friend Jan? She's a member of one of my favorite book clubs, Reading Group of Sisters and Friends.
 Remember Jan has a beautiful line of jewelry that she makes called "Bejeweled by Janeth"? Remember these gorgeous earrings with dynamic Swarovski crystals that change color according to the light that she made for me?
Remember? Well, Jan's website, "Bejeweled by Janeth," is now up and running, and guess what? She's named the above earrings after me!!! The crystal drop earrings will now be called "Lolita"!!! How awesome is that??!!!
So be sure to visit the website to check out and BUY some of her amazing pieces. Per Jan, the site will be updated daily with new merchandise, so anyone browsing and/or shopping should check back daily/weekly for new items. She'll also be running sales and specials, so you should definitely pay her a visit!!! Another sister doing the damn thang. Her website is also in the "Links" section of this blog, so she's always just a click away.
Let's show her some love, y'all, let's show her some love!!!
Bejeweled by Janeth
Previously: The Lo Zone: I'm "Bejeweled"!!! |
| posted by Lo @ 10:44 AM |
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| Meet "Rich In The STL"!!! |
| Wednesday, May 24, 2006 |
You've seen his comments on The Lo Zone. You've seen his name in the posts. And now it's time for you to meet him in the (South Park) flesh:
 Rich and I go waaaaaaaaaay back. Further back than even we realized. He's good people, real good people. We're lucky to have him as a part of The Lo Zone.
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| posted by Lo @ 1:20 PM |
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| Ode To Melicious. |
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Me.
An intimate spot in Burbank.
Libra magic.
It's been a long time coming.
Something's going to get eaten.
And here it is:
[What? What did y'all think we were going to eat? Git yer pervy minds outta the gutter. He's my dear friend and we haven't seen each other in awhile. Pssssst!! Yo, Dawnya...you know where I can get some Pop Rocks?]
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| posted by Lo @ 12:25 PM |
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| They Make Me Feel Brand New. |
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One of my all-time favorite groups, The Brand New Heavies, have reunited with their original lead singer, the awesome, wonderful, fabulastic N'Dea Davenport...
 ...and are dropping a new cd (!!!) called Get Used To It on June 27th.
 You have noooooo idea how excited I am about this. You don't even understand. I first got into The Heavies in 1991 with the release of their self-titled cd.
 The music they created with N'Dea fronting the group...
 ...has stood the test of time of being some of the most amazing acid jazz ever. Hell, forget the acid jazz part. It was just damn good music. Period. The Heavies (with N'Dea) have been a major part of the soundtrack of my life. N'Dea's voice was simply stunning, the essence of soul...it just made you feel good when you heard her sing. The group's music, coupled with that remarkable voice, made every part of you want to dance: your feet, your heart, your spirit. I was devastated when N'Dea left and was replaced by Siedah Garrett and then Carleen Anderson (both of whom are incredibly soulful sistahs I'm also big fans of individually...just not with The Heavies).
Visit the band's MySpace site to hear some of the new songs from the upcoming cd. Music will begin playing as soon as the page loads. There are a total of four new songs to choose from. For the record, Sex God is pretty damn hot.
And just to give you an idea of what I mean about how good this group was in its original manifestation, here's my favorite, favorite, favorite song by them, circa 1991. Click the link below to listen.
The Brand New Heavies
Amazon.com: The Brand New Heavies: Get Used To It
The Brand New Heavies' MySpace Site
N'Dea Davenport's MySpace Site |
| posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM |
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| You've Got Your Boy Lance To Thank For This One. |
| Tuesday, May 23, 2006 |
I not only took a long, long, lonnnnnnnng drink of water after watching this, I also brushed my teeth.
Enjoy (I think).
[click "play" (the arrow button) to watch]
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| posted by Lo @ 4:03 PM |
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| Happy Trails To You. |
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Check out my soror's fabulous limousine company here in Los Angeles. And no, this is not some one or two-car limo business (no disrespect to those that are, we've all gotta start somewhere). This is the real deal: a full-blown car service that offers the gamut in luxury travel and treatment.
...and stretch SUVs (Hummers, Escalades, and Excursions).
They can be reached at: R&B Limousine, LLC137 North Larchmont Blvd. Suite 643 Los Angeles, CA 90004 Phone: (323) 679-8152 Fax: (323) 525-1401 General E-mail: info@randblimo.com
Let's show some love. Another sister doing the damn thang!!! Skee-wee!!!
[For future reference R&B Limousine is listed under the "Links" section of this blog, ready for that moment when you need car service in L.A.!!!]
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| posted by Lo @ 12:25 PM |
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Okay, This Is Funny As Hell Heck Heaven. |
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Check out this video short that's a parody of two popular movies (I'm sure you'll figure out which ones they are).
It's too funny. Especially when that burning bush speaks.
YouTube.com: 10 Things I Hate About Commandments |
| posted by Lo @ 11:46 AM |
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| Upgrades To The Zone. |
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Just in case you didn't notice, I added a slide show to the sidebar of this blog, over on the left just below my profile (the section called "About Me"). It's got about 73 pics in it so far, enough to keep you slightly amused and entertained (I hope). If you wait long enough, you might even see a photo of yourself or your South Park alter-ego, like our boy Larry Lowe here.
 Also included are pics of my book tour you never got to see, like the D.C. and Atlanta stops.
Just another way of me giving back the love. You know how we do up in heah.
Enjoy!!!
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| posted by Lo @ 9:05 AM |
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| Stop Rooking At Me!!! |
| Monday, May 22, 2006 |
While trying to read what I found to be quite an interesting article online in Sunday's New York Times, I suddenly noticed out of the corner of my eye something brown advancing towards me. Literally. Whatever the thing was, it was actually moving, freaking me out so much I was forced to look at it head-on. It was one of those moving advertisements so many websites go in for these days, and the New York Times has really been trying to get on the stick in terms of being interactive and high-tech online.
Turns out the brown thing was Jay-Z's face. The jacked-up part of it all, though, is that once the ad did all the moving it was going to do, it didn't disappear. It just stayed there. Jay-Z's big brown face and those eyes were just staring at me and, truth be told, I was a tad bit uncomfortable.
[click the image and try to ignore his face...I dare you]
I'm a huge fan of Hova. Huge. But something about having him peep me like that was too much for me to deal with. I couldn't focus. I abandoned reading the article with more than a page and a half still left.
I wonder if he stares at B like that. Actually, now that I think about it, whenever I see pictures of them, she's always the one who's staring at him.
 Black love...you know the rest.
New York Times.com: 24-Hour Sweaty People |
| posted by Lo @ 11:25 AM |
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The Antidote To Bill Doomsday Cosby. |
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Last week, Bill Cosby made some pretty jarring remarks about the state of the African-American male, advising Spelman's graduating class to "pick up the pace and lead because the men are not there."
 As regular readers of The Lo Zone know, I'm pretty positive and supportive when it comes to black men. I'm not blind to the state of our affairs on the cultural front, but I also don't operate from a position of hopelessness with a "half-empty" mentality. I grew up surrounded by strong, present black males. My uncles, my brother, friends, teachers. And I had a father who adored me, even though he was quite strict and we often bumped heads over the silliest of things.
 I was his "Skuffcat"---a nickname he gave me from birth and called me until his dying day, some seven years ago. I will always be my Daddy's Skuffcat. I will always fight like a soldier for my black men.
Lo Zoner Monique...
 ...sent me the following video that speaks in positive powerful tones about strong black men who are present in their children's lives, even though, ironically, they are incarcerated. Monique, who found a loving, educated, strong black man of her own when she moved to Atlanta, wanted to help beat the drums for the positive. We march on for our brothers. No matter how bleak things may seem, now is not the time to declare that black women abandon ship. All is far from lost in the battle to uplift, uphold and encourage the righteous legacy of the black man.
[click "play" (the arrow button) to watch]
[Monique, girl, I couldn't mention you without putting up your South Park likeness. Gotta give the readers a visual, you know. Thanks for sending me this video. It also gave me a good excuse to put my dad's pic up again. Hey guys...if for some reason the video doesn't come on within about eight seconds of you clicking the "play" button, just refresh your screen and try it again.]
Previously: The Lo Zone: Bill Cosby Is Full Of Hope For Black Men.
Previously: The Lo Zone: Seems Like Even Older Times. |
| posted by Lo @ 10:33 AM |
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| Muy Fabuloso!!! |
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This past Friday, my dear friend, Shaun Robinson, hosted me at a gathering at her beautiful home.
 Her book club had selected my novel, Sex.Lies.Murder.Fame.
 ...for their May read, and boy, did I have a great time with these ladies!!!
 Shaun really set it out, too. There was a mouth-watering endless spread of food, creole-style, catered by an excellent restaurant based in Los Angeles called "The Creole Chef." There were the tastiest of eats, from a most extraordinary shrimp in cream sauce dish that blew me away (I think the name of it was Shrimp Yvonne), to saucy chicken wings, chicken fingers, salads, catfish, a massive yumtastic cheesecake, bread pudding with bourbon sauce---too much to mention. [The restaurant is at 3715 Santa Rosalia, next to the Baldwin Hills Crenshaw Plaza in Los Angeles (323) 294-2433.] Champagne and wine were flowing. My head was swimming from everything.
 What was the most fun, however, were the ladies in the book club!!! The room was filled with twenty-plus powerful women, many of whose names (first and last) you would easily recognize. I say that not to name-drop (which I haven't done anyway), but because I was SO PROUD of these beautiful black women and the strides they've made in a town that can be pretty tough to break into.
The house was packed with women who really got into the discussion of the book. We were loud, boisterous, demonstrative, you name it. It's the kind of intense interaction an author dreams of, where you see that the readers truly savored your words and your story, and something about it came alive for them. We examined Beryl, Penn, Shar, all of it, with great gusto and zeal. I was simply giddy throughout the entire night. What was really cool was one of the women was a crime scene investigator, so we had excellent dialogue/debate about the murderous aspects of the book.
Shaun's dapper dad, Wylie, was also in town...
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