The Lo Zone

The mayor of a small Brazilian town has begun handing out free Viagra, spicing up the sex lives of dozens of elderly men and their partners.

"Since we started the free distribution of sexual stimulants, our elderly population changed. They're much happier," said Joao de Souza Luz, the mayor of Novo Santo Antonio, a small town in the central state of Mato Grosso.

Souza Luz said 68 men over the age of 60 had already signed up for the program, which was approved by the town's legislature and has been dubbed "Happy Penis," or "Pinto Alegre" in Portuguese.

But the program has also had the unforeseen consequence of encouraging some extra-marital affairs, Souza Luz said.

"Some of the old men aren't seeking out their wives. They've got romances on the side," he said.

To discourage such illicit canoodling, Souza Luz said the city had decided to begin distributing the Viagra pills to the wives of the men who signed up for the program.

"That way, when the women are in the mood, they can give the pills to their husbands," he said.

Two peace activists have planned a massive anti-war demonstration for the first day of winter.

But they don't want you marching in the streets. They'd much rather you just stay home.

The Global Orgasm for Peace was conceived by Donna Sheehan, 76, and Paul Reffell, 55, whose immodest goal is for everyone in the world to have an orgasm Dec. 22 while focusing on world peace.

"The orgasm gives out an incredible feeling of peace during it and after it," Reffell said Sunday. "Your mind is like a blank. It's like a meditative state. And mass meditations have been shown to make a change."

The bodies of four women were found Monday in a ditch behind a motel, not far from the Atlantic City Visitors Welcome Center, authorities said.

The bodies were found face down in several inches of water, said Janet Niedosik, a spokeswoman for the Atlantic County prosecutor's office.

One body was discovered by two women walking on a path, and police found the other three, Niedosik said.

The bodies were "some distance apart from each other," Atlantic County Prosecutor Jeffrey Blitz said.

Autopsies were scheduled for Tuesday.

The bodies were found in Egg Harbor Township, less than 200 yards from a welcome center on the edge of Atlantic City.

Onlookers said the area around the motels is known for drugs and prostitution.

"You don't stay here unless you're doing something wrong," said Danielle Trombetta, 16, of Egg Harbor Township.

News Corp. CEO Rupert Murdoch has pulled the plug on the upcoming Regan Books title from O.J. Simpson, If I Did It. A tell-all of a different variety, the book, which was to be Simpson's outline of how he might have committed the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, was scheduled for release on November 30 and was to be accompanied by a two-part TV interview to air on Fox on November 27 and 29.

After the book was condemned by booksellers (many of whom said they would donate proceeds to the victims' families), media critics and even pundits from Fox News, News Corp. announced in a terse statement that the book and TV special have been dropped. Murdoch said: “I and senior management agree with the American public that this was an ill-considered project. We are sorry for any pain this has caused the families of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown Simpson.”

Dear Cheryl: What is the protocol for proper behavior after sex? I'm curious about how men treat the women they've just made love to. I'm sure there's a difference if it's love versus lust or committed versus promiscuous.

Let's take the case where the man cares for the woman and is not using her. In that case, what is expected afterward? What is normal behavior?

After being made love to, I like to spend a few minutes snuggled deep in strong arms. I like to kiss, giggle and connect on another level. I like to cuddle, if you will.

However, the guy I've been seeing for the last few months feels the exact opposite. When the deed is done, he gets very antsy. He practically becomes a stranger. All the kissing, stroking and tenderness stop cold.

We're arguing because the last time we made love, he left the room almost immediately after we were done. He tossed me a towel and disappeared into the living room, leaving me alone and naked on the bed. I waited until I realized he wasn't coming back in to lie down next to me, talk to me or at least look at me.

I felt foolish and stormed out of his apartment without saying a word. He didn't call out after me. He didn't even call me until the next day to ask me what was wrong. I was embarrassed, as if I had just delivered a booty call, but he thinks I behaved like a spoiled child.

I tried to stress that after-sex behavior is just as important as before-sex behavior. He claimed his disappearing act wasn't intentional. Then he proceeded to add that "we" just weren't working out and we shouldn't do "this" anymore. I was like, "Fine!" (What else could I say?) What an embarrassing experience!

So, do you think that makes him a jerk, or am I overly sensitive? I'm very curious as to how other women, and men, feel about behavior after sex?

-- Seduced and Abandoned -- Or Was I?

A picture book about two male penguins raising a baby penguin is getting a chilly reception among some parents in [Shiloh, IL] who worry about the book's availability to elementary students — and the reluctance of administrators to restrict access to it.

The concerns are the latest involving "And Tango Makes Three," the illustrated children's book based on a true story of two male penguins — Roy and Silo — in New York City's Central Park Zoo who adopted a fertilized egg and raised the chick as their own.

Complaining about the book's homosexual undertones, some parents of Shiloh Elementary School students believe the book — available to be checked out of the school's library in this 11,000-resident town 20 miles east of St. Louis — tackles topics their young children aren't ready to handle.

Their request: Move the book to the library's regular shelves and restrict it to a section for mature issues, perhaps even requiring parental permission before their child can check it out.

At least for now, the district's chief isn't budging. Though a panel she appointed suggested the book be moved and require parental permission before it is checked out, Superintendent Jennifer Filyaw says "And Tango Makes Three" will stay put — at the advice of the district's attorney, who says moving it might be legally challengeable censorship.

Filyaw considers the book "adorable" and age appropriate, written for children ages 4 to 8.

By the time Carnival Cruise Lines' Liberty pulls into Port Everglades this weekend from a transatlantic voyage, more than 700 people on board will have been afflicted with a highly contagious, stomach flu-like illness that appears to be norovirus, the cruise line said Wednesday.

The outbreak could be the largest reported in recent years by the cruise industry.

"It's impossible for now to say what the source is," said David Forney, chief of the cruise ship sanitation program at the national Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. He said it's likely passengers brought the virus with them when they boarded and it spread from there, but U.S. inspectors will look at whether food or water contributed to the outbreak.

[...]

As of Tuesday, 556 guests and 154 crewmembers on board the Liberty had reported symptoms lasting one to three days, according to a statement issued Wednesday by Carnival Cruise Lines. The Miami-based company said the ship is carrying 2,804 paying passengers and 1,166 crewmembers.

The ship, currently on a 16-day tour that began Nov. 3 in Rome, is scheduled to arrive in Fort Lauderdale on Sunday.

The outbreak began within 24 hours of the departure and raged the strongest during the first five days while the ship was crossing the Atlantic Ocean, Forney said.

A California couple are facing federal charges after they refused to stop "overt sexual activity" during a flight to Raleigh, authorities said.

Carl Warren Persing of Lakewood, Calif., and Dawn Elizabeth Sewell of Huntington Beach, Calif., are accused of interfering with flight crew members during a Sept. 15 Southwest Airlines flight from Los Angeles with a stop in Phoenix. They face a Dec. 11 trial date in U.S. District Court in Wilmington.

According to court documents, flight attendants saw Persing and Sewell kissing, embracing and "acting in a manner that made other passengers uncomfortable" while the plane was stopped in Phoenix. Persing was observed kissing Sewell near her breast and was also observed with his face pressed against Sewell's lower body.

A flight attendant asked them to stop. They obeyed initially but resumed the behavior during the flight from Phoenix to Raleigh.

When the flight attendant again requested them to stop, Persing allegedly told the flight attendant: "I'm going to give you one warning to get out of my face."

Persing and Sewell continued the verbal harassment after a flight attendant refused to serve Persing alcohol, according to court documents.

Law enforcement officials were waiting for the couple when they arrived at Raleigh-Durham International Airport.

Fox plans to broadcast an interview with O.J. Simpson in which the former football star discusses "how he would have committed" the slayings of his ex-wife and her friend, for which he was acquitted, the network said.

The two-part interview, titled "O.J. Simpson: If I Did It, Here's How It Happened," will air Nov. 27 and Nov. 29, the TV network said.

Simpson has agreed to an "unrestricted" interview with book publisher Judith Regan, Fox said.

"O.J. Simpson, in his own words, tells for the first time how he would have committed the murders if he were the one responsible for the crimes," the network said in a statement. "In the two-part event, Simpson describes how he would have carried out the murders he has vehemently denied committing for over a decade."

The interview will air days before Simpson's new book, "If I Did It," goes on sale Nov. 30. The book, published by Regan, "hypothetically describes how the murders would have been committed."

Four people taken hostage by a gunman at a pharmacy overpowered their captor Monday after he demanded prescription drugs and fired several shots, authorities said.

The 90-minute standoff ended when the hostages, who were barricaded inside the store with the gunman, hit him with something, Sheriff's Deputy B.E. Ferrell said.

None of the hostages was harmed, but the suspect was taken to a hospital, Ferrell said. The nature of his injuries was not immediately clear, but a witness said he had taken a painkiller and an anti-anxiety drug.

The gunman arrived with a handgun and a sawed-off shotgun, taking six people hostage at the Family Discount Pharmacy in Stollings, about 60 miles southwest of Charleston, according to Logan County 911 Director Marilyn Crosby.

Pharmacy technician Jessica Thompson, 24, said the gunman said he needed drugs but could not afford to buy them.

Tyson Foods Inc., the world's largest meat processor, warned Monday that rising corn prices could mean U.S. consumers will have to pay more for chicken, beef and pork next year as it ended its fiscal year with a third straight quarterly loss.

The Springdale, Ark.-based company forecast a return to profitability in the new fiscal year, which started Oct. 1, as it gets a grip on costs and focuses on more efficient operations. Its shares rose 4 percent.

"The best thing I can say about fiscal 2006 is, it's over," Richard L. Bond, president and chief executive officer, said in a statement.

Bond said the price of corn, which is used as animal feed, is going up because of demand from ethanol plants that are springing up to provide alternative fuel sources to oil.

Is there nothing sacred anymore? Leave my freakin' bird alone.