| Lo Fun Fact #1 |
| "Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. To this day, she has no idea what a "Lolita" is. |
| Lo Fun Fact #2 |
| I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes. If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Mr. Chicken (my favorite spot in Cleveland) and a pair of
Christian Louboutins. |
| Lo Fun Fact #3 |
| Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi (preferably Pepsi Jazz Caramel Cream). Better yet, how about not show up at all? |
| Lo Fun Fact #4 |
| I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay? |
| Lo Fun Fact #5 |
| I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!! |
| Lo Fun Fact #6 |
| I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position. |
| Lo Fun Fact #7 |
I have four five six wonderful, slap-happy dogs, a bird (some kind of dove/pigeon mix), and a cat, all of whom I love to pieces. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs, bird, and cat, we'll be instant friends. If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five six dogs, a bird, and a cat, see the above fun fact for how I will respond. |
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| I Want My Fat Ass Santa Back!!! |
| Thursday, December 20, 2007 |
This is NSFW in some places, but funny as hell. Enjoy!!!
Santa's THE ONLY GUY who can get away with manboobs and a gut.
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posted by Lo @ 12:05 PM   |
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| 7 Comments: |
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Lo, that is hilarious! Where the hell did you find it?!
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Babygirl, you are outta control. That right there is off the hinges. Santa smoking chronic with Dr Dre? Omigawd! I'm over here DYING!
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Genius, pure genius. This is the funniest thing I've seen in weeks.
Oh, and manboobs are gross. Manboobs AND a gut? Triple yuck with a side of vomit. Sorry if that offends any fat guys reading this. It's not a good look. So unless you're married to Mrs. Claus, spare your woman the nightmare. Push away from the table and join a gym....or borrow Santa's staples.
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LOL, LOL, LOL, LOL!! Santa gets his stomach stapled, dumps his wife and moves to LA? I got tears running down my face from watching this!!
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......And I'm with Ginger about the manboobs. They are super-gross and so is having a gut to go with it. I went out with a guy who took his shirt off in front of me and had manboobs. I don't know how he did it but he had them hid real well until he took the shirt off. Call me shallow but brotherman never saw me again. He was a punk anyway, a momma's boy who drove a raggedy car that was always breaking down and he was always broke. He ended up going back to live in his momma's basement. I bet his manboobs are super-huge by now.
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Lo, that is hilarious! Where the hell did you find it?!