The Lo Zone

A groovy place in cyberspace run by author Lolita Files. Come on in. Bring some Pepsi.

 
Lo Fun Fact #1
"Lolita Files" is my real name. It is not a pen name, as incredible as that may seem. There are plenty of Files family members and people who have known me for years capable of validating this. As for the "Lolita" part, my mother named me after the movie based on Nabokov's book, although she saw or read neither. To this day, she has no idea what a "Lolita" is.
Lo Fun Fact #2
I love fried chicken and fabulous shoes. If you ever want to get on my good side, send Popeye's or Mr. Chicken (my favorite spot in Cleveland) and a pair of Christian Louboutins.
Lo Fun Fact #3
Never show up unannounced or without a Pepsi (preferably Pepsi Jazz Caramel Cream). Better yet, how about not show up at all?
Lo Fun Fact #4
I hate the telephone. Don't get mad if I don't call you. I don't call anyone. Don't call me asking why I don't call. Just don't call, okay?
Lo Fun Fact #5
I love the internet!!! I love communicating through the internet!!! You can e-mail me and odds are I'll e-mail you right back (if I'm not in the middle of a major project). Makes up for my hangup about the phone, doesn't it? See, I'm not so bad after all!!!
Lo Fun Fact #6
I can't stand IMing. Please don't IM me. You will get the cold shoulder. I don't like giving people the cold shoulder, so please don't put me in that position.
Lo Fun Fact #7
I have four five wonderful, slap-happy dogs and a bird (some kind of dove/pigeon mix), all of whom I love to pieces. If you meet me and ask me about my dogs and bird, we'll be instant friends. If you meet me and ask me why the f*ck I have four five dogs and a bird, see the above fun fact for how I will respond.
Computer Cellphone Love.
Monday, May 05, 2008
As a person in a perpetual love-hate relationship with cellphones ("I'm a techie!!! That new gadget is pretty!!!" then "People keep calling me!!! I'm getting rid of this phone!!!), I was late to the whole text messaging game. I got on board in late '06 and thought it was the best thing ever ("I can talk to people without having to TALK to people!!!"), but eventually I realized that it can be artificial device for establishing what might seem like a real bond when it's really just a tool for some people to hide behind. When used as a substitute for the early stages of dating, all kinds of deceptions can occur. People make empty promises and lie about everything from sexual prowess to how (and if) they make a living. Why? Because they can!!! Just like with a computer, they can make you believe they're something they're not, as long as you're not in front of them to verify things. That sucks, although it can be really exciting when you're in the midst of it. Still sucks, though, because, sooner or later, they have to step out from behind their cellphones and you get to see who they really are (or aren't).

I found texting to be an excellent tool for sending quick messages regarding business and to people I already have real relationships with, but as a way of getting to know a person, finding out who they are, and possibly building a bond---very, very bad. Nothing can or should ever replace true human interaction, especially when two people are just getting to know each other.

Unfortunately, however, that's the time we live in. This is the era of the bait and switch, where even losers, armed with deceit and hiding behind a cellphone, can have their moment in the sack and the sun. Sadly, many a woman (and man) has fallen for this trick, led on in excitement by a string of increasingly alluring texts only to be disappointed in the end. Fortunately, however, there's a funny little video that I saw over on Gawker last Friday that captures this whole ridiculous process in a nutshell. Odds are you'll see yourself in this cute little clip or---ye gads!!!---your relationship and how it started and maybe ended. Gaze on in wonder/horror at how dating in the age of lying-meets-lazy technology unfolds. Happy Cinco de Maio!!! Oh, and if you get drunk today and meet "The One," text with caution.


[refresh your screen if you can't see the player]

posted by Lo @ 7:32 AM  
3 Comments:
  • At May 5, 2008 12:12 PM, Anonymous Dana said…

    I hate texting, yet it seems to be the way everyone tries to date these days. It's such a cheat. Guys use it as a way to talk without actually having to really 'talk.'

     
  • At May 5, 2008 6:51 PM, Anonymous Jan said…

    Busters love to text.

     
  • At May 5, 2008 7:51 PM, Anonymous Will said…

    I'm a texter, but I don't oversell who I am. I like it to communicate but nothing can replace a face to face connection.

     
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About Me

Name: Lolita Files

Home: Wonderland, Midwest Central, United States

About Me: I'm the author of six novels. My novella, "Three For The Road," included in the three-novella anthology, You Only Get Better, was published in March 2007.

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